Ready for sex?

If you haven't had sex yet, don't worry. The chances are that most of your friends won't have had sex either, whatever they say.

It's completely normal to be interested and excited by the thought of having sex and to wonder what it might be like. But it's also normal to feel worried or confused about it.

With sex, it's only right to take the plunge if you absolutely feel like you're ready and you really want to.

Peer pressure

Only when you're ready!

If you don't feel 100% ready yet, you don't have to have sex. Don't let anyone put you under pressure to have sex and always say no if you don't feel ready.

If you want to talk to someone about having sex for the first time, contact Ask Brook by text or webchat (IM) - your conversation will be confidential. That means they won't tell anyone about it.

Peer pressure is when your friends try and get you to behave in a certain way, when you don't really want to. For example, you might feel like you have to have sex, because your friends have pressured you to.

Doing things because you've been pressured into it is never a good idea. Think about what you want, and what you feel happy about doing, and don't go any further than that, whatever your friends or your partner tell you to do.

Under pressure?

You might not always realise that you're being put under pressure, but if any of the things below apply to you, then you could be...

  • You feel like it's easier to have sex than to say no.

  • You feel you're being pushed into having sex.

  • All your friends say they've had sex so you feel like you should.

  • You're afraid you'll lose your girlfriend or boyfriend, or that they won't love you any more if you don't have sex with them.

  • You've been drinking or taking drugs to help you feel more confident.

Know the facts

It might help to know that these are the facts:

  • Most people aren't having sex under 16 - studies show that most people wait until they're at least 16 to have sex, and some wait much longer.

  • Being in love doesn't mean you have to have sex, and having sex doesn't mean you're in love!

  • Not having sex isn't a sign you're immature.

  • Saying no to sex is a sign of confidence and maturity.

Got questions about sex and relationships?

Talk to someone

Brook

Do you need to talk to someone about sex or relationships? Brook provides free and confidential sexual health services specifically for young people under 25.

Brook offer a confidential service. This means that they don’t talk about your what you’ve said to anyone outside Brook without your permission unless you are in serious danger.

The Ask Brook service provides sexual health information, support and signposting for all young people under 25 anywhere in the UK.

Contact Ask Brook by text and webchat (IM) from 9am - 3pm Monday to Friday.

Text Ask Brook on 07717 989 023 (standard SMS rates apply)

The Webchat service is available through their website at www.askbrook.org.uk.